haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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