He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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