and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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