we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
