Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
