so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
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