i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Randomize