Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
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