I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
