We're like a lot better than the average bears
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
my poor anus
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
