he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
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