Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
