you would pick up someone in the library
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
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