you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
