I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize