Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Enjoy the penises
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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