you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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