If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
