dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Randomize
