i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she pinky promised me she was 18
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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