Screwed.edu
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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