dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Randomize
