I just cut my nipple shaving
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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