I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
