i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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