similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
