Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
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