They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
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