i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Randomize
