At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
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