i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
