My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
