I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
