if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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