D3 body, D1 cock
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize