Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Randomize
