So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Randomize
