And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
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Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
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No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
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