I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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