Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
she smelled like a LAN party
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
