come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
should my penis look like a turkey
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
