I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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