Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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