just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Randomize