i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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