She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
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