Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
