sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
