you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I have feelings that need drinking.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
