Buhtt sex?
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
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i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
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Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
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